A sock, we learn, is only as strong as its weakest thread. When we read this we think immediately of ZK and his plans to... No. It can't be. Surely not even ZK would... It seems to horrible to contemplate. But there it is, staring at us. The enormity of such a devious plan can only...
Tell everyone. Tell them now. He must be stopped. Grab your pitchforks and your torches, and join together. If this is allowed to go on, then we're all--
Someone's at the door. He's found me. Charles H. Darwin on a bicycle, he's found me. Listen. It's not too late. If we band together, then surely we can stop him. I only have seconds left before his minions break down the door. Gather yourselves. If we try to fight him as individuals, we're all doomed. Only if we act as one can we hope to stop this dread-- They're here. Fight, friends. Fight!kl'k'l456+6+6++';l'
Ladies and gentlemen, I apologise for the brief lapse in standards that took place there. I am of course the same person who was typing previously, and am in no way an imposter. I have never taken the oath of ZKness; in fact, I never even heard of it.
I was mistaken. Far from being an evil goblin from the Misty dimension, ZK is a benevolent being who has our best interests at heart. Munificent being that he is, he seeks only help us through these dark times and lead us to a glorious future. The rumours -- the lies -- that you may have heard about his planning to gather for himself all the lint on Earth were malicious calumnies, cynically put out by craven poltroons who wish to deny humans the bright future you so richly deserve.
I shall now continue with my analysis, as I have always done.
In the first panel, we see the great ZK and his faithful assistant Ndbag seeming to fight over a sock. This is far from the truth! The sock is our fears and doubts, and ZK wishes to take that burden from us. Motivated by his great love for his master, Ndbag is distressed at the thought of the mighty ZK taking all this on himself, and seeks to sacrifice himself for the Great One.
Foolish Ndbag! Do you not think that the Great One is incapable of shouldering such a burden alone? Do you not realise that that is why ZK has entered this dimension; to take upon himself all our suffering, that we may serve him all the better?
It is only when we have cast off our socks that we shall be free to follow ZK. Only then will we be enlightened, and see the Great One as he truly is.
But is it enough to give up our socks? Is there not more we can to to achieve the nirvana we have long sought? There is!
Our foolish human obsession with lint holds us back. We may look upon it as a panacea, but in truth it is a crutch we use; a crutch that only seems to support us, but that in fact tethers us to the ground. If we are to slip the surly bonds of earth and fly, then we must relinquish it. Only then will we be able to achieve our true potential.
Truly, we are fortunate that the Great One has chosen to take upon himself that illusory comfort. Fellow humans, I urge you all to join me in realising our destiny. We must follow ZK! We must obey his commands, for he knows what is best for us! Abjure the lint! Join ZK, and we shall rule the universe! Join him! Join!
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